A Coward Writer

fear-light-1480015Buying journals as gifts is a signature action of mine.  I have bought journals for my children, but I did not show them how to use them.  They know that I write and love to write. Yet, I have not tried to inspire them to reach deep inside and share their innermost thoughts with only the paper tucked inside the journal that I bought.  Tonight, I asked them to bring their journal to me.  Inside each of their journals, I wrote a writing prompt.  Each child was given a different prompt.  The pride that my children exhibited as they wrote in their journals was so uplifting.  They were afraid to use their journals because they did not want to make a mistake.  They did not want to do it wrong.  Writing in a journal is personal and should reflect who you are inside.  I should have expressed this when I gave it to them.  Sometimes, an expectation clouds our judgment. As demonstrated, with the journals.  My expectation that they should know what to write in a journal because they see me writing in one distracted me from being the master teacher, who explains everything.

Subsequently, I thought about how I am being a coward when it comes to my writing.  Why am I afraid to just write and publish what I am thinking? Why am I afraid that my work will not be accepted by an audience? Why am I letting cowardice control who I am as a writer? Why does it matter? Shouldn’t I just write and expect that someone will appreciate the words and messages that I want to share?  I need to reach deep down inside of myself and examine why am I being a coward writer.